Thursday, January 7, 2010

Fear

Confessions Series, Part 3; Fear

Carole stood looking out the window as her daughter rolled past on her skateboard, noting the absence of a helmet. Everything about Kelly’s posture said that she was still angry. Carole normally drove Kelly to school and she didn’t like that Kelly had taken off on her own. She craned her neck to keep her in view as long as possible. Her baby was growing so quickly. Where did the dark clothes and the hateful words come from? It seemed all too often that all that remained of her baby girl were the pink shoes.

“Sam, time to go to school,” Carole yelled down to her younger daughter. Relief flooded over her to know that she still could count on Sam’s sweet demeanor and childlike ways. How long, wondered Carole, would it be before Sam also grew an attitude? Hopefully never.

“I love you mom,” said Sam, planting a sweet kiss on Carole’s cheek as they headed out to the car.

“Thanks baby, I needed that,” said Carole as she backed carefully from the garage cluttered with boxes, bikes and storage bins. Was there any part of her home that wasn’t filled with clutter?

“Why are we going this way, Mom?” asked Sam from the back seat.

“To check on sissy,” Carole mumbled, considering whether Kelly had had time to get to school. Carole didn’t want to embarrass Kelly by driving by and checking up on her, but she had to know if she made it safely to school.

Sam was singing along with the radio, a song about Llamas, when Carole rounded the corner just in time to see the whole event unfold. The last thing Carole remembered about that moment was having a feeling of fear in the very pit of her stomach like she had never experienced in her entire lifetime.

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